Sunday, February 8, 2009
This new black painting is killing me. Ive realised why I felt like utter crap all day , it's this paintings. It's got to all my hidden nasty insides.
If this is new window, then it's lost its colour and it's patterns and turned into a black nightmare. It has just occured to me that this can only be because it's coming from my crappy childhood and background, the one i escaped many years ago. This painting has put me back into what I call survival paintings. It's the type of paintings which clears out your soul and get down into all the painful bits. It's 5pm and I just starting to feel like myself again.
Yet it's a great painting. I haven't painted from this foul depth for a while. It's certainly suffering for your art but it is also very honest. Anyway, that's what I do. I express this sort of stuff. If I go on with these black paintings, it will hurt and i will feel like shit but they will be great pieces. better out than in.